muwhaha!! i shall post a disgusting pic here. haha. no i shld say it is "super sexy!" haha.
"sexy" right! haha. nthn much this week. same old stuff. n oh e number of times me oversleeping has been increasing!! THIS IS BAD!! haha. shall get more alarm clocks.




Mr Goh spoke to me, faezah n siti today. Hai..i'm also disappointed with e mock result! Could have been better! Sheeessh. Even yat yan is improving so much, y can't i jus improve as much as him? haha. n now he wan us to get 70 for paper 2. stress stress stress!!!!




anyway today is mid-autumn festival. e sch kinda sux anyway. poor planning!! how can they have e promos at this time!! then e sch cannot celebrate mid-autumn festival unlike last year. anw this year's mid-autumn also nthn special. don have e mooncake i wanna eat. i shall jus fill my tummy with pomelo. haha. Juicy juicy fruit!




ok nthn much liao..but i'm wondering who is annon. anyway to annon, if u don like e content in my blog, u can jus leave. I nv force u to stay n read and no point commenting if u ain't putting ur name. how insincere.

ROAR!!!! I FUMING MAD AFTER READING SOMETHING!!! ROAR!!! ROAR!!!







How can u have e cheek to say tt! HALO! we don't manupilate and USED pple. In e first place there is nthn for me to make use of from u. haha. Thinking abt it now, it seems rather funny. haha. As if u have LOTS of things to let us make use of. bleah~~~~~~







It also doesn't seems to me tt u have a great personlity either. I know we don have fantastic personalities and characters but hey, u are no better. If not why wld u even want to befriend us in e first place. Don tell me crap such as u are being tricked or we had a fake mask or shit like tt.







Also, i had the upmost respect for those pple who u consult them for advice. But after what i saw they had to say, i'm utterly disappointed. They don't know us well and it was only A ONE SIDED VIEW! Come on, i still know have some skills i learned from ss. So what they heard are literally BIASED! it is a biased source.







AND! AND! AND! we are no complicated at all. U thing we so free, make ourself seem so complicated? U think we got nthn better to do? I think it is e fact tt u thinktoo much. We are not complicated at all. Or maybe u don't understand us at all. I dare say tt i don think i understand u well enough. There is nthn to hide. Don force us to see it in ur way when u don see ours in e first place. To be mean, u have nv grow up at all.







BLEAH! haha. i shall finish up my dinner n throw away all this anger and fustration! ahah. lala. i'm a happy person.







anyway i saw JINGZHI TODAY!!!! haha. and yenling saw me but i nv see her. so sad. nvm shall see her on her next shift! haha.

It seems to be a very tense week. Not becos we gt our results back and stuff, but something seemed to have happened this week before and now there is this unseen hostility and tension ard us. Everywhere. Hard to fathomed what it is and it is even harder to comprehend what has taken place. Cos no one knows except those involve and those who were being filled in by those who were involve.




Hope this tension and hostility ard us vanish or dissipate. Cos i'm feeling rather stressed in such situation. Cos i'm at a lost on how to behave or react and i can't simply ignore it cos i can feel its existence so strongly. And i got my reconfirmation from others. So what to do? hmm..i donoe.




Maybe we shall see how the current situation will evolved to when e new week begins.

I hate everything around me now. And in case u can't sense anything, this post is typed in the moment of impulse and anger. If u are not interested in hearing me nag, whine or complain then forget it. U can jus leave right now.




Sometimes i jus wish i have the cutage to tell my cousins how much i hate them and how much i long for them to return to their own home. U can say i'm selfish but i see no point in y i shld share things in my hse with that fucking family. They have the same things as us but y must they keep using our stuff? Creating so much troubles and irritation in our lives? Y must i lend them my writing pen for them to draw? Halo! tt is for me to do my work NOT for u to fucking draw on a peice of paper. Y must we always lend them our com when they have one com and one lappy? Y? U DONNOE HOW TO FUCKING USE YOUR OWN COM IZZIT?




I'm not in e least gratefuk for them for making breakfast for us on sun mornings. Sorry but i wish to sleep longer n i hope u won't come to my hse so early and disturb us. We nv ask u to come to our hse and cooked breakfast for us. Seriously, i don find it nice of u. If u wan breakfast u can jolly well stay at ur fucking hse and cook ur own fucking dinner. Becos when u cook hear, we are the one wasking the dishes not u. U only make a mess out of it.




Sometimes i also hate myself for being so soft-hearted towards to fugly kids. I jus simply hate everything abt them. Their smile, their voice, their presence. It jus totally disgust every bit of me. They can hate me jus as much but i don give a fucking care. N i hope they hate me too. So they won have to come over to my hse and see my fugly face. There were always so many times tt i tot of moving out to live on mu won after my NS. Maybe i'll stay in e hostel during my uni times. provided tt i manage ot get into one. I rather wash my clothes, do the dishes and work part time to pay for the rent then to go home and face them. N most prob, i'll jus find a flat and rent it and nv to return home maybe only on weekends. I know it is very selfish of me but hey i jus wan to have a live of my own. A live woithout them, jus me. Afterall i only get to livee once. Finding time tt belongs to me isn't a crime. I've always hopt to collect anime figurines, anime dvds and have my own room with all my favourtie posters. Buti nv get to acheive them. Y? cos even they have to take up part of my hse.Becos of them i can't get wat i always wanted and because of them my hse is always ina mess. There are soooo many times tt i wished i cld bring my frens to my hse. But my mum always say the hse is in a mess and you cannot bring ur frens. So now, because of them i feel so restricted so tied up. i don feel at home at all. i see nthn tt belongs to me sometimes at all. They nv know jus how much inconveneice they have brought upon us, how much quarells my mum n dad had becos of them, how many times me n my sis gets so fustrated with them as well. They nv understand and they nv know.




Sometimes i jus don uderstand y can they see our helplessness and fustartion towards them? Are they jus trying to act dumb? Pretend not to see anything and continue bring them here so tt we can help them look after them and they can jus slack. Maybe moving is the best plan afterall or until i got the courage to tell them how mcuh i detest them and tt they shld jus go home where they belong and not come and impose on others. You knw what? i'm still counting the numbers of years they have been staying here. To surprise everyone, it is the 9th year..going to 10 soon. I have nv had my own home or family for 9 years. TT is pathehic n tt is what is driving me crazy.

ok i've done a mean thing today.



Very mean. serious. haha. but well..i jus can't help myself.




Alright i admit the fact tt i'm mean, but neither do u have to get so emotional over it. If u really care abt it then i think it is alright to get emotional. But if u treat us like dirt, what's those emotional show or act u are putting up for? Wallow in self-pity? Make yourself e victim?



Alright but i must admit ur act did make me feel guilty. But not towards you, but to others who have to suffer in my place.



N it does make me pity u. Seriously pity. U get it? I PITY YOU! you don have to feel happy abt it. No point. Cos it jus degrade yourself. Wanna know why? Oh, but i must warn u first, like i've said earlier - I M MEAN. So if u wanna continue reading, pls do but don't go ard telling other wat a poor thing u are or tt u cry to sleep after reading this entry. If u are not prepared - SHOO! -



But in case u wanna know how i pity u, pls carry on reading.




I pity u in a way tt u are ALONE. YES ALONE. U have frens ard u, but u treat them like dirt too. so tt make u ALONE.




I pity u becos u try to have high expectations for others but they don't now n they don meet up to them n you get disappointed. sad. TT's stupid. becos u don't cherish for who they are but u want them to be what u wan. U nv get real frens tt way. U DON'T!




I pity u bcos pple have to act they don mind listening to your complaints and tt u make them suffer more than u do but u'll nv get it. U NV WILL.




And since i pity u so much, i shall be nice to you in a way tt is evil too. I will smile at you whenever i see u. Be prepared to received my smiles. U don have to return them. You jus have to see those curves on my lips.




Oh a peice of advice. Reflect upon ur actions, not others.

WOOT! Prelims is officially over! ok, it was over abt a day ago. haha.




After prelims went swimming!! YEAH SWIMMING! n it has beeeeeeeeeeeeennnnnnnn soooooooooooooooooooo loooooooooooooooooooooonnnnng since i swam. haha. n i got burnt! real bad at e face n my upper arms but not my chest and back. BOO HOO! wat an uneven burn. haha.




After tt went home n rest. Soon i bath again n left e hse n meet sock hwee n sephine to go to marina bay to celebrate harry's birthday. Half of the grp went first while me, sock n speh waited for puden and shin jia. Then after they arrived we went to meet e rest at zhen fa. Ate quite a bit. After eating went to arcade to play. haha. i only spent 50cents! ahah. n seph had to treat me in order to make me play. haha. i'm rather evil n stingy when it comes to playing in e arcade. ahah. THX SEPH! if u are reading this. hha. after tt went home with e rest while shin jia, harry n yat yan stayed at e arcade. Upon reaching e station, me sock n speh went down to the mrt station while puden n gang went to the toilet. After a while we heard BOOM BOOM sound. then we realised it was fireworks!! so puden and gang n e 3 of us climbed up e slope and watched e fireworks. IT WAS BEAUTIFUl! all e colours!




After tt went home.







Ok n tt was yest. Today met up with eunice for breakfast! YES! she has came back from her europe trip. haha. had breakfast at the prata place near hans. IT IS GOOD! so long since we ate prata there. ahha. cheap too:) and air-conditioned! After tt went to upper thomson road to walk walk. Went to the foodcourt to see e pics eunice took and had calbury chocs!! n some belgium chocs too! YUMMY! after finish watching e photos went to ntuc to get some water n i was eating e chocs while walking. THEY SUPERB!! so long since i've eaten nice chocs! then went to northpoint. While waiting for aunty ng's sis to meet her, we went to arcade and play. haha. SO EX!tsk tsk tsk. DAYLIGHT ROBBERY! haha. but in e end i still play. haha. after tt went to take neoprint! ahha. n then we went separate ways.haha. N oh! eunice gave me e WHOLE BOX OF CHOCS!! CAlBURY CHOCS!! YES!! WHOLE BOX!!! YIPPEEEEEEEEEE!! haha.




n so, i'm drown into the pool of yummy chocs and flooded by endorphins released by the hypothalamus. haha. YEAH! THEY NICE!!

FINALLY! FINALLY! this week has passed.




It has been a super long week. brain draining and also a week tt kind of demoralize me.




First was bio paper. i feel tt it was ok. But mr azahar feedback tt our paper 2 so far no on pass. This is crazy. Then tues was maths n chem. Maths..hopefully can get anough to pass. Chem..i gues may may is going to shout at us again. Wed was bio paper 1. quite ok. thurs was chem paper 2. also gone case. SOOOO many question so little time. may may sure volcano erupt. or go monkey crazy. n today was maths paper 2. i think i'm pretty stupid. all of a sudden i cant do them.




hai..n now they say gp low passing rate. they might as well jus shoot me dead. sometimes i wonder what i'm doing too.




i'm so tired. tired of studying. tired of having exams. tired of going to sch and hear my teacher nag. tired of failing. i jus wan to sleep forever.

Most kids nowadays are rather loud. N i really mean LOUD. i was on a bus today going back home after studying with my fren and there was this bunch of students talking so loudly! Like as if their frens were all deaf or there were at the coffeeshop. At least my frens ain't tt loud. I've been witnessing such scenes for countless times. Usually these kids would be sitted at the back of the bus and i would usually aviod sitting at the back. Partly because they are pretty loud and partly because they're in a big grp and it is quite intimidating. haha. Laugh at me and call me coward but hey it's true. Sometimes they stink too. Literally.




N do i look very scary? There was this lady that actually came out of the lift when i pressed the button before the door closes. N when i enter the lift she quickly drag the kid out. What is her problem? i know i'm ugly but not ugly to the scary part. TT is so mean of her and i was so stupid not to check if she pressed the six level button. In the end she did and i stupidly jus walk out of the lift and found myself in a different env. haha. n when i walk back to the lift got 2 couples came down from e staircase and i think they were laughing at me. SO MALU! in the end i jus climbed up the stairs. EEEE. what a day. SHEEESSSHH. haha.




PRATA TML! WOOT! YES!! haha.

Received a shocking sms today from one of my frens. She told me e croc hunter-Steve Irwin has passed away while he was shooting a documentary film. He was killed by a stingray where its barb peirced through the the croc hunter's chest and into his heart. Well, a quite a piece of sad news cos i used to watch his croc hunter show n i like him. Funny and enthusiastic in what he do. It was also his passion for nature and attracted me to watch the show. Poor fellow.




Anyway today went out to study. It was quite productive i guess. haha. So little time so many things to study!! shall make better use of my time now. ok i shld update till here! haha. off to bath and study!! STUDY STUDY STUDY!! n yeah tml going out to study again!!! how i love studying outside!! it's rather productive! haha. ok bye guys!

Alright, i went blog hopping for awhile jus now and soon the green little monster call jealousy paid me a little visit. ahha. itchy itchy hands of mine. Well, i was surfing e blog of my sjab frens and reading those entries they wrote the duties they have n their relationship with their cadets kinda make me jealous.




Even though it has been like 2 to 3 years since my corps close down i still misses sjab. Even though how much i told pple i hate sjab, i actually misses it. What i really hate was the management at e headquarters and what i missed is the fun i had with my cadets, seniors and me fellow squad mates while doing duties, camps, parades or training. All those that i'll nv go thro again. No more first aid com, no more Jnco, snco and training camps, public duties. No more parades, commands to shout or drills to practise. No more medical tools to play with, to learn its usage. No more bandage to play with, no more partner to tie your bandage on. No more kisses with the dummies and molesting cases of the dummies as well. one last thing. No more forms to fill in.




Well, listing all these things made me sad. cos it is really NO MORE. Wonder if it'll appear again and even if it does it belongs to us (my ex corps pple) and not joining other sch. Because e feeling will nv be e same.




Suddenly, i miss wearing my uniform and wonder if my decision of not going to OTC under another corps was a mistake or not. hai..but all these are already the past. time to move on time to move on. how i hate this nostalgic feeling. it can be so funny at time when u think back. But now it is e sad part.




ok i shld go back n soaked myself into the wonderful world of chemistry.

Today was a so-so day. Had GP prelim 2. well nthn much to say.




after tt museum trip. shan't comment much on it. yes.



i shall not harp on bad things.



i shall not harp on bad things.



i shall not harp on bad things.




Went to civil defence heritage museum instead of history museum due to e change of venue of the history museum which is also known as e National museum now, located at Stamford Road. haha.




after museum trip went to town n walk with my class. another great bonding day. or maybe not? haha. more like search party going ard to search for lost sheeps. ahha. quite funny.




left ard 6plus or 7plus with jean. n it RAINED!. met eunice over at e underpass on e way home. ahha. gave her a shock. then went home. watched a few episodes of tsubasa chronicles n here i m updating on my blog.




haha. i'm kinda no life. well, too bad. i won't be even having ANY life for e next month or i shld say till my'A's is over. AHH..how wonderful. haha.




ok meeting with mr tay tml. yay! so long nv see him n can get free treat. MUWHAHA. but very paiseh. always he treat us. haha. but it is once a year only. haha.. ok i admit i'm thicked-skinned. but don worry not as thick as e rhinocerous' or elephant's skin. haha.

Teacher's Day is round the corner and tml all the schools would be having their teacher's day celebration. While, everyone of us has our own favourite teachers where we admired them for the hard work they put in and the amount of time they are willing to sacrifice to help us.




During my sec sch days, most of the teachers i've come acrossed or worked with are rather nice. haha. Well, compared to my JC teachers i guess they would naturally be much better.




Ever since i've came to this sucky JC, i've never really like any teachers or admire them like i do in sec sch execpt for a few (like my form teacher).




Many students hate or dislike him bacause of the way he does things. He is much like any other normal teacher that comes into the classroom and impart their knowledge to their students. However, he is slightly different than most teachers i've met in my JC life. You may be stupid or slow in your work, you may not be performing well in your studies but he doesn't scold or jeer at you, telling you that you are stupid or hopeless or ask u to drop your 'A's (like some dumbass). Instead he will stretch out his hand and pull you up. He constantly encourages you, giving you some pressure and yet at e same time assuring you that it is within your abilities to do it. He shares weird yet sometimes valuable lessons and stories with us during lesson time.




He may not be well-liked by the teachers as well in the school because of the unique approach he took. Despite that he has faith in himself and truely believes that we as his students are capable of doing well even though we may be looked down by other teachers. The time he sacrifices, the amount of hardwork and sweat he had put in and the countless motivation and encouraging moments he gave to us were exceptional. No other teacher can be like him.




He may be haughty at times but it was nv too much. I admire him for not giving up on us despite the fact that we might have failed him countless times as his students. Because of us he had to suffer insults or snide comments from other teachers but he nv once gave up on us. Sometimes i wonder where did he get so much strength to carry teaching and motivate us.




As his student, i'm proud to say i have a teacher like him. I guess i'll nv find another teacher like him. even though he won't be reading my blog but i'll still like to wish hm a happy teachers day! he rocks!

Seriously, maybe i'm jus too dumb for 'A' levels. Even though this time it was only a mock paper but still i failed it. Looking at my teacher's expression just made me speechless. Well, his expression wasn't only for me, but for his other classes as well. I don't understand why other people can jus laugh it off. Maybe this time i took it too seriously? Or what was it?




Sometimes i just wonder why had i take e jc path? To me, it seems like it was a terrible mistake. Even though it is too late to even think of it, i can't help myself but to think what would actually happen if i actually took e other path.




Maybe i'm jus another kid tt is going to waste my parents hard-earned money jus to get a cert filled with Fs. Well, maybe to prevent all this from happening, someone can jus kindly shoot me down. Don't worry i'll write a letter explain tt i forced u to shoot me down.




Now, everything jus seem so bleak, so dark, so cold.

The great escape plan operated today was considered a half failure-half success! Wasn't too happy with the outcome. But for now i shall talk abt e success.




Everything was moving smoothly and according to the plan in the morning. Mum and sis left the house at 9 along with my other cousins and aunties and neices (the nicer ones of course. not those monsters at my hse). Dad had to standby for work, so he went to bath. While i woke up, e phone rang. I picked up the phone and it was my nephew. He asked if my dad would bt at home but i told him no, he would be working. Then, he was quite happy when he said the next sentence, but being a mean unvle i crushed his hopes! MUWHAH. he assumed tt i wld be at home, but when i told him i wld be going out, i can hear a tinge of sadness and disappointment. And my heart was filling with joy and slight excitement! haha.





Anyway later in e morn met up with chiying and pass her, her birthday gift. Then had lunch at mac. Went to popular to get some pen. Ah..n i bought a black pen on impulse! BAD ME!!! becos of tt pen i spent $1.90 which i could have saved. STUPID ME! okt then after tt we went to kiddy to look at soft toys and then we headed to the mrt station. She went tot admiralty to have her tuition and i went tot khatib to meet zah to study. Saw a few pri sch fren. Baolong and ahmad zaki. haha. ahmad zaki called me first. he look abit diff. haha cos he kept long hair n he look abit like hagrid. ok i know i'm bad. but he really does. haha. then at ard 6 plus me and zah left mac and went separate ways. haha.





Ok, tt is all for the success. Everything was rather few except for ceratin events tt occur. and so i shall continue to narrate on the failure part.




Earlier on as my cousin knew tt there might be noone at home she decided to come to my hse to collect some stuff. Most prob milk powder and some clothes. Then my dad was soooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo foolish. HE GAVE THEM AN EXTRA SET OF OUR HSE KEYS! i was like for wat!!!!!!! aiyo! then nvm, if my dad did not had to standby for work he wld have been in msia. n our hse would not have been infested by pests.




Next, even if my dad was at home and he cooked dinner, there was no need for him to call then to come over for dinner. Why worry for them? they are old enuf to have e brain and $$$$ to feed their own child lor. i lnow i'm being mean but hey tt's a fact. Why so troublesome. Stupid pests! ok tt is all. I shall go study for my bio test tml.

Yeah!! i think i'm growing fatter. Maybe i'm jus dreaming but i jus feel tt i m growing fat. haha. tt is a gd sign. BUT!! BUT!!! it is growing fat at e wrong place!! i'm growing fat at my tummy!! tt is e last place i wan my fats to go. it is disgusting to have a pot belly for guys. i would rather have it at my arms. haha. ok i have plan my "Escape from e evil clutches of the idiotic and useless family" on sun. All shall proceed smooth without any hiccups. MY PLAN WILL AND SHALL WORK!

I jus received news tt shocked my soul out of my body for a split second. Yes! it is tt shocking. My family is going to msia this sun with my another cousin. n me being e suay kid who nv go renew e passport cannot leave s'pore. But i don mind not going. e worse part is knowing tt i'll have to stay with my f***king cousin n e f***ing kids. see now i can't contain my displeasure and how i abhor them.




it jus makes my blood boil to actually know tt i'm stuck with them. so i've decided to runanway from home on sun! i'll go to the woodlands regional library n study! I die also don wanna stay at home with them. so anyone interested in running away from home with me this sun? haha.

It's weird how men can actually have mood swings like women does. Well, it's all e hormones fault. N today is one of those days where my hormones are not working in order. Yes, i got my mood swing waving and smiling at me.




For what reason i do not know but i jus know tt i'm quite irritated by him today. Seriously no idea y. Somehow his look, his actions and behaviour disgust me much till e bones. haha. Funny how mood swings can do to one.




I also realise tt i'm becoming more n more dumb n i gess my dumbness and stupidity is irritating pple. But hey, u think i wan to be stupid and dumb? Sometimes if u think u are os great then go your screw yourself up before talking to me. DON ACT AS IF YOU ARE SO GREAT! In fact, there isn't any greatness in you at all.




See, mood swing. it does 'wonders'.




What a stressed up world i'm in now. ARRGH!! fustration.




Oh! Well, one happy event took place today. I FINALLY GOT MY HAIR CUT! yes! tt long, untidy, messy wild grass growing on my head is being cut! YES!




Well, tt's all.

Aiyar! jus now type a small entry but something wrong with e com then e whole window disappear. now my re-type.



Anyway yes, i actually had a draft of what i wanted to type earlier on, but i jus can't remember once i sat down on my com chair. Weird huh. haha.




The sch recently has gave e Jc2 this so-called condensed timetable. But after my class have observed e timetable, including all e remedials, it jus seemed e same as e orginal one except tt we do not have a lunch break. YES! NO LUNCH BREAK! can u hear my stomach growling now??? it goes like this "GRRRRRRRR..." but no worries, it won't be as lous as harry's. haha.




It seems to be tt staying in sch to study is quite fun afterall. haha. Well the productivity is average. n i had a fierce teacher. haha. Shin Jia is e fierce teacher. But he is gd. Oh, milo is gd too! So does milo + coffee. haha.




N i need a haircut desperately! My hair is super long and untidy n i look like shit. haha. anyway e hair also tickles my forehead cum eyebrows. haha. itchy itchy. n i feel tt i'm no different from e guy from s12. e big mushroom head who always block my view in e previous maths lecture. His hair also so messy n erm..ok shall not comment more cos i'm no better than him now. haha. anyway they say his head is e mushroom like in maple. haha! so pple grab ur swords or whatever n hit it hard! jus don mistook him from me. HAHA.




well there is nthn much i wld like to say anymore. *YAWN* i wanna sleep liao. gd night everyone. sweeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeetttttttttttttttttttt dddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrreeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaammmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmssssssssssssssss

Phew! What a day.

James Blunt - You're Beautiful Lyrics

My life is brilliant.
My love is pure.
I saw an angel.
Of that I'm sure.
She smiled at me on the subway.
She was with another man.
But I won't lose no sleep on that,
'Cause I've got a plan.

You're beautiful. You're beautiful.
You're beautiful, it's true.
I saw you face in a crowded place,
And I don't know what to do,
'Cause I'll never be with you.

Yeah, she caught my eye,
As we walked on by.
She could see from my face that I was,
F**king high,
And I don't think that I'll see her again,
But we shared a moment that will last till the end.

You're beautiful. You're beautiful.
You're beautiful, it's true.
I saw you face in a crowded place,
And I don't know what to do,
'Cause I'll never be with you.
You're beautiful. You're beautiful.
You're beautiful, it's true.
There must be an angel with a smile on her face,
When she thought up that I should be with you.
But it's time to face the truth,
I will never be with you.