ouch. i rather u not say it so blatantly sometimes. or so bluntly. even though i know i have the same thoughts but at least i make e effort to hide it at times. pffffttt..i'm feeling a little sore now. hai..PPPFFTTT

Sometimes the truth hurts because they seem to be coming at you and punching you in the guts. Same for reality. As it starts to sink in, you sink deeper into depression. haha. BOOHOO! got to go back camp real soon. Like in another one and a half hours time. SIANNNNNN.

Anw, went for the Nike+ Human Race yest. It was a fun event but the route could be better. But overall it was quite fun. hahaha.

I want a longer breakkkkkkk. hahahaha.

For the past few days I've been wondering what i should blog about. Till just today, I've decided not to mention what happened during the past few weeks because it'll be very boring and dry. Instead I'll be posting up videos. (:

Teardrop by Massive Attack.


This happens to be the theme song for the show House. hahaa. Original Version. Nice (:

Next is the other covers did by other artiste.

The first cover shown is by this band called Elbow.

Elbow "Teardrop" Massive Attack


Next we have a cover by Incubus. I like e guitar solo part. I think it is pretty nice.

Incubus Teardrop


Lastly this is by Newton Faulkner. Never heard of him before until I heard this song. hahaha.

Newton Faulkner - Teardrop


And I like this cover best.

Well, enjoy pple.

It is always heartwarming and touching to know that you have a wonderful group of friends who will always be there to comfort you when you are down or when you are in trouble. They give you comfort and reassure you that everything will be alright. Be there to hear you out and help you when go through tough times. Such friends are hard to find and i'm really glad that I have found such friends in my life.

These are the greatest army buddies i could ever find. Always so understanding and always tolerating with my nonsense and my random mood swings. They are really there for me when i need help or when i'm down in camp. They make camp an even lovelier place. Love them all loads. (:
And these lovely ladies accompany me to sch everyday since sec sch! Nothing we can't do eh! haha. Always surrounded by their laughter and random lameness. hahahaha. They are the greatest ladies I've ever met and known. Strong and smart. Thx for being there to help me tide through sch. (:

Sometimes it is nice to take a step back and really appreciate all those who have been there to help you out and been there to hear out in your life. Thx to all my friends who have been so supportive of me and listen to me whine, complain, laugh, go crazy with and do nonsense stuff with. Thank you all so much! (:

The Killers - Everything Will Be Alright Lyrics

I believe in you and me
I'm coming to find you
If it takes me all night
Wrong until make it right
And I won't forget you
At least I'll try
And run, and run tonight
Everything will be alright
Everything will be alright
Everything will be alright
Everything will be alright

I was out shopping for a doll
To say the least, I thought I've seen them all
But then you took me by surprise
I'm dreaming bout those dreamy eyes
I never knew, I never knew
So take your suitcase, cause I don't mind
And baby doll, I meant it ever time
You don't need to compromise
I'm dreaming bout those dreamy eyes
I never knew, I never knew
But it's alright...

Everything will be alright
Everything will be alright
Everything will be alright
Everything will be alright

This song is stuck in my head. Even though it doesn't link much to what i've said earlier. But still it is nice. This song is to all my friends (:

Just got the urge to blog again.

Can't wait for the 16km this Fri at ECP and dinner after that! (:
So looking forward for it!

Dinner at Timbre with Joyce and gang is still unconfirmed! Hope they'll all be free (: Guess i'll try n book them. whahah!

10km run later!

And more rehearsals tml. WHOLE DAY!! Good and bad. Will be seeing sylvester! But it be a bloody whole day full of rehearsals. haha.

Well at least i have my buddies in camp. haha. Still no motivation and drive. haha.

I WANNA ORD!

Mum and Dad is sick since friday. Both got fever. All thx to my irritating nephew who was sick and passed e virus to them.

Dad's getting better..but mum seems to have no changed. She went to see e doc again..n as usual more medicine.

hope they recover soon.

I'm tired. I want to have a getaway!
A getaway from camp, from work, from family.

I need to recharge my batteries. I have no motivation to work. No drive.
I do not want to go back to camp!

ppppffttttt..i'm just tired and i want my rest.

The train has moved.
Again.

Time to move on.
And it feels good.

I'm happy again (:

I'm stuck.
Like a train that is stuck on the platform and not moving anywhere.
Like a train that suddenly brakes on the track and is stalled for 15 mins or even shorter or longer.

Too much has been happening this year.
I'm stuck on a spot and i'm not moving. But everything else around me is.
Everything is moving at a rapid pace and they seemed so blurred.

Too much is on my mind.
Family, friends and myself. My health.

I will move and I need to move.
But now i'm just like the train that is stuck.
Time is the key to everything.

No matter how much i'm trying to support my parents' decision on what they are doing now i can't help but to blame them to a certain extent. I have no idea how long will I keep supporting them or will there be a day where I'll just tell them that everything is not alright and I'm sick and tired of it.

It is kind of annoying and i'm seriously fucking pissed that the long anticipated getaway trip I've been looking forward to since June or even earlier has to be canceled. Why is life so unfair!?!? WHY!!! I SO FUCKING HATE THIS! I'm so mad at angry. I'm very upset about this too. WHY? WHY? WHY? ARRRGGH!!!

Well, some might say there is always another time for a getaway. But I'm just so fucking pissed that it has to be canceled because my parents can't pay my sis school fees and now the brother has to pay for her. WTF right. hai...seriously. I hate all these money problems. Why is it always me and my sis panicking about it?

In the past when i'm 16, i would have said " I'm just a student. Why do I have to bother about such stuff? This is too much for me to handle."
Now I'm reaching 20s, it feels like a fucking responsibility or something that i should be worrying about. Like an obligation. And you know what? I HATE IT! But what can I do? I'm not born with a silver spoon in my mouth. Now all i can do is, according to e army term, lan lan suck thumb and work things out or make things work.

I'm not even sure about my own future. I have 3 choices but out of 3 only 1 is feasible. Or should I say it is not as financially draining to my family? Hai....seriously life is FUCKED UP.

yeah..cheers to FUCKED UP LIFE.

Wahahha. A funny conversation i had with my frens. hahaha. I was laughing throughout.

- S - says:
u all got the oasis song don't look back in anger
- S - says:
lol
[g]Professional Rubbish Bin says:
L² shld have it
- S - says:
send mi
- S - says:
i lazy go find
[g]Professional Rubbish Bin says:
i haven rip his oasis album yet
- S - says:
haha
- S - says:
lol
L² says:
hmmm
L² says:
hold on ah
[g]Professional Rubbish Bin says:
haa
- S - says:
lol
L² says:
u owe me
L² says:
hahahaha
- S - says:
ok
- S - says:
np
- S - says:
i ask zk to satisfy u
- S - says:
lol
[g]Professional Rubbish Bin says:
ahhaha!
L² says:
ok i cancel
[g]Professional Rubbish Bin says:
ahhaha
- S - says:
i m sry
- S - says:
lol
L² says:
slap u
- S - says:
i m sry
- S - says:
lol
[g]Professional Rubbish Bin says:
AHHAHA!!
[g]Professional Rubbish Bin says:
FAN JIAN!!!
[g]Professional Rubbish Bin says:
NO BACKBONE!!
L² says:
yes
L² says:
hahahahhaa
- S - says:
haha
[g]Professional Rubbish Bin says:
ahhahahahahaha!!!!
[g]Professional Rubbish Bin says:
this is so funny
L² says:
well i did cancel
L² says:
hahahahaha
[g]Professional Rubbish Bin says:
omg..ahhahahah!!!
[g]Professional Rubbish Bin says:
hahahahahhaha
- S - says:
buay lun
- S - says:
haha
L² says:
huh
L² says:
u buay lun me????
L² says:
i cancel again
- S - says:
okok
L² says:
hahahaha
- S - says:
i m sry
- S - says:
lol
L² says:
hahahaha
L² says:
i cancelled
L² says:
again
L² says:
hahahahhaa
- S - says:
psst
[g]Professional Rubbish Bin says:
hahha
[g]Professional Rubbish Bin says:
aiyoo
[g]Professional Rubbish Bin says:
hhahha
- S - says:
lol


hahaha. dumb n funny. they are my frens n i love them (:
also to protect their identity i won reveal who they are except that professional rubbish bin is me. haha.

I'm bored!!!! So bored.

Bored bored bored bored bored bored bored.

See, that is how bored i am.

Oh! and something disgusting. I woke up at 10 had my brunch at around 11 and guess what.
I HAVE YET TO BRUSH MY TEETH!

ok. gross. i know.

last thing.
I'm BORED.

I need a big pail to pour everything out. I keep having this bad vibes again. This bad worrying feeling like something very very bad will happen to someone. hai..

Another week has ended and this week has been a crazy week for me, my friends and my family members.

Went to see the MO on mon and told them about my condition and they got my blood sample and urine sample. The same day, they called me at 11p.m and told me about my alarmingly low platelets count. I was so worried that i couldn't sleep that night.

On tuesday i went to the medical centre to get my test result and passed it back to my Unit MO. After reviewing me, he and other MO decide to send me to the hospital for further check-up. The whole process was both physically and mentally draining me out. haha.I was so worried about myself but at the same time i have to assure people around me that i should be be fine and asking them not to worry so much and do not panic. I was so tired as the night before i didn't sleep well. I keep smiling to the Unit MO to tell him i'm ok and i'm accepting this very calmly. But i guess he could sense me still panicking inside. He comforted me and tell me everything should be alright too.

Then i called zk to follow me to the hospital. Was so grateful to him that he was following me and he knows i was trying my best to look normal. haha. But he knows i was going crazy and mad inside. I'm so glad he was there. After registering and waiting for a few moments at the NUH A&E emergency walk-in, a nurse called me over. She did the routine check ( blood pressure, family history of any illness, drug allergies) and told me i was a serious case and i will be send to the observation room. She doesn't want me to wait outside and knock myself or get myself cut and die bleeding to death. No one was to draw my blood or inject me with anything except for the doctor himself.

The doc himself then came and say i might be suffering form dengue. haha. He then drew my blood and proceed to send it for lab test. About 1 hr later, he came n told me i was fine. PHEW! I was so happy! Grinning from ear to ear. haha. Then i called zk in and told him the good news. haha. i was so guilty that he had to wait for me for 4 hrs.

After the drips and everything we then went for dinner and it was my treat. hahaha. We deserve it. After going back camp everyone was asking me if i'm ok and what really happened to me. I feel so loved. Knowing that so many people are concerned. haha. For the next few days, everyone was telling me not to work and rest more. hahaha. It was comforting to know that everyone care. aahha.

Ok, now i shall wait for my urine test results from the MO. Hope everything will be just right.

Apparently my whole body is on strike now. Flu, sore throat, cough and a fever since yesterday. Yesterday was also weapon's bbq :). It was a great gathering. Even the old man came! ahahha. Met leon at kembangan n went to siglap to get some photos printed. After tt went back to his place to get lunch and met up with dasen n shawn afterwards.

We then took a cab down to siglap centre to get the groceries. Potato chips and beer! :) After grabbing the chips n beer we head back to leon's hse to wait for the caterer and we start to make e cards for mono 10. Played with leon's dogs. hahaha. Both are so cute. One tried to hump me and the other was biting my pants cos he still teething. hahhaha.

Halfway through the day i was down with fever and e 3 of them keep asking me to rest, which i was already doing cos i was doing nothing at all. hahahah. Soon the others (Zhongyi, cing han, jie bin and qiyang) came as well. At about 5 plus we brought all e food down and started to start e fire. Since i was sick, i jus sit in 1 corner cam whoring. ahaha. But was mostly taking pics of others. hahaha.

Later in the evening more pple start to appear. hahaha. Everyone was enjoying the food, the booze and e companion. hahah. It was great. haha.

Today i finally got the letter from NUS. Yes, e one that decide my future. haha. REJECTED. Well, kind of expected? haha. Not feeling much now. Cos i know i've tried all e possible ways. ahahha. At least i appealed. ahhaha. Guess OT might not be a bad choice after all. At least aunty is enjoying? haha. i shall start to map out my future again.

ok.i got the doc to check on me. 2 to be exact. Now i got a referal letter to the hospital. Let's hope everything is ok with me.

I wonder why when i have a problem, i'm the one telling e rest not to worry instead of them telling me not to.

It gets a little tiring u know. And somehow u don't get any comfort at all. U have to worry abt it yourself and tell others not to.

Weird huh.

I'm trying not to freak out...but I am. I'm scared. My body is giving me problems. Guess i have to see e doc again. ARRGHH!! hope nothing is wrong.

I feel like a fool now. A clown. Worry for nothing. But i'm glad that nothing happened. haha. I shld stop giving myself unnecessary problems to worry.

ohhhhh...i'm getting paranoid now. I'm worrying for nothing. ppppffffttt. I'm super worried and super paranoid. ROAR!